Mayor's Musings - World Menopause Day

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As we gear up for World Menopause Day on Friday 18 October, I can’t help but reminisce about a quirky visit we had a while back in the mayor’s office. Aline Boblin and her brilliant team from Menopause Knowledge rolled in—literally—on their "Menopause Wheels," a mobile educational unit aiming to spread awareness like a menopause-themed ice cream truck, minus the fun jingle. But this visit was no small affair. They had a mission: to support women navigating menopause, a life stage that is as inevitable as it is misunderstood.

 I have spoken to many women and they tell me, menopause is a unique experience for every woman. There’s no universal manual. Its not a one-size-fits-all solution like it's some generic flat-pack furniture. Some women sail through with little more than a few hot flashes, while others feel like they’ve been hit by a hormonal freight train. Recognising this individuality is key to breaking down the outdated idea that all menopausal experiences are the same. It’s time we ditched that thinking and instead embraced a more personalised approach.

 Menopause is often a full-body takeover. Not just physically, but emotionally and psychologically. It's the ultimate "surprise" stage of life, like puberty’s annoying older sister, showing up with a few more aches, unpredictable mood swings, and sudden urges to turn the thermostat down to sub-Arctic levels. 

But let’s face it, it's also a wake-up call. Menopause is your body saying, “Hey, time to focus on me now.

 For most of our lives, women are master jugglers. Our to-do lists are so long they could double as beach towels, and funnily enough, our own needs are often crammed somewhere near the bottom. But menopause demands we shift gears. It’s time to put ourselves at the top of the list, where we belong. This isn’t about self-indulgence; it’s about survival. It’s about recognising that this stage of life requires us to prioritise our health and well-being in a way we might not have done before. And sure, this shift might throw off a few people—your spouse, your kids, maybe even your boss—but guess what? That’s okay. It’s your time now. 

 So, let’s get to the million-dollar question: What about the men? Believe it or not, World Menopause Day isn’t just a women's club event with hot flashes as the dress code. Men have a big role to play too. Whether you're a husband, partner, friend, or co-worker, you can either be a hero or a hindrance during this phase. And trust me, you want to be the former. Here’s a tip for the menfolk: educate yourselves.

Menopause isn’t some distant, mysterious "women's issue." It’s something that affects relationships, families, and even workplaces. We’re talking about real-life consequences here. So, instead of shrugging it off as “just hormones,” why not pick up a book or, even better, Google it? Learn about the physical symptoms—like those sudden tropical heat waves in the middle of a winter’s night—and the emotional rollercoaster that often comes along for the ride. Knowledge is power, guys. If you can learn to work a remote control with 70 buttons, you can grasp menopause.

Next up, communication. Menopause has been a taboo topic for too long. It’s like the Voldemort of life stages—everyone whispers about it but nobody wants to say the name. Let’s change that. Ask her how she’s feeling. Encourage open conversations. Break the silence. Don’t let her feel like she has to navigate this stage in secret. Believe me, your willingness to talk about it (and listen) will mean the world to her.

Now, I know this next part may sound like a challenge, but stay with me: be patient. Menopause is unpredictable. One day she might be fine, and the next, she’s trying to rip the duvet off the bed in a sweaty rage at 3 a.m. These symptoms are temporary, but your support through them is what matters. A little patience and compassion can go a long way in making this process easier—for both of you.

In the end, menopause is not a solo journey. It’s a shared experience, and everyone involved - women and men alike - can benefit from a bit of teamwork.

With the right support from those around us, women can face menopause with strength and confidence. And yes, that includes men learning the difference between a hot flash and an actual emergency.

World Menopause Day is a time for women to reflect and take charge of their health, but it’s also an invitation for men to step up. By educating themselves, offering support, and fostering open dialogue, men can be the sidekicks every woman needs during this stage. We don’t need you to fix it (because, spoiler alert, you can’t). We just need you to be there, listen, and help create an environment where we feel seen, heard, and understood.

 So, this World Menopause Day, let’s come together. Men, women, everyone. Let’s raise awareness, support each other, and remind the world that menopause is not just a “women’s issue” relegated to whispered conversations. It’s a shared experience that deserves attention and understanding.

 Menopause may be challenging, but with the right tools, education, and community, it’s also an opportunity for women to reclaim their health, well-being, and personal power. Because menopause is not the end of something - it’s the start of a new, empowering chapter.

 Shahin Ashraf, MBE

Mayor of Solihull